Running Myself into the Ground

So, I've been running a lot lately. I started getting up at 5:00am and running with a group of multi-marathoners. After a few mornings talking with them, I started to feel like quite a loser that the longest I had ever raced (other than the Ragnar relay) was a 10K. Running a marathon has always been one of my lifetime goals. But after running a 15-mile training run one Saturday, I decided a half marathon was a more appropriate goal for this year. The plan was to run the Sojo Half Marathon on September 25. It was a perfect course: a gradual downhill descent from Copperton Park to the Jordan River trail in South Jordan. It ran right passed my high school coach's house and across many of the cross country training runs of those days, and also right passed my sister's backyard.

Race day was beautiful. We took buses to Copperton before sunrise. I saw my cousin Jenny who I have completely lost touch with and we chatted a little before the race to calm each other's nerves. The beginning of the race was wonderful. My only race strategy, however, was not to go out too fast, which was, of course, exactly what I did. Because I didn't have a GPS watch, I didn't realize I was running 6:49 pace until the end of mile two. I felt like I slowed down the next few miles, but then as I hit my split at end of mile four, I realized I had actually sped up slightly. I found this older man who was trying to hit 7:15 pace like me, so we stuck together for the next few miles. But he is apparently no better at pacing than I am and we still went sub-7:00. By the half-way mark, I knew I had to slow down and was actually starting to feel somewhat fatigued already. I had just taken sips of water at the first few aid stations, barely breaking stride. I started to slow down a little more at the stations and get a little more water in me.

Each mile got much harder. As I started to count down the miles, I really started to wonder how I was ever going to finish. With two miles to go, my body started to completely check out. It was screaming at me to stop running, but somehow my will to finish screamed louder. I dropped way off my splits and started walking through the aid stations. I suddenly felt really hot; my mouth really dry; my body completely wasted. I started seeing and hearing strange things (the psychology world would refer to this as hallucinating): the finish-line time clock, my high school coach, my college coach...everyone looking more disappointed at my poor performance. My thoughts became more negative and fuzzy. With one mile to go, I started to stagger and some race volunteers told me I really should pull out, that I looked ill. I told them I had to finish, but they stayed with me. That last mile felt like a lifetime (it was actually a grueling 24 minutes). I don't remember coming onto the homestretch, but apparently Ryan saw me and raced out to meet me and supported me through the finish line, where I fell to the ground unconscious.

The next hour was a haze of endless questions, wrenching nausea, and indescribable pain. Although I tried to convince the medics I was perfectly fine, I found myself in the back of an ambulance headed for the ER. I was completely disoriented and my body felt detached from my head. My body didn't move correctly; my voice was all wrong; the race seemed years ago. I asked my diagnosis. Dehydration. Was that really all? I had never felt worse in my life, or more scared. I felt like I was dying.

Well, to make a long story shorter and sum it up, after 4 1/2 hours in the ER, four liters of fluid, an EKG, and a battery of labs and questions, they finally said my labs had improved enough that I could go home. By then, I had come back to myself, somewhat, and knew who I was again. I went home and was still very nauseated and weak for many hours into the evening. But I was alive and that's all that mattered. I sure gave my parents and Ryan (and myself) quite a scare.

So, I've been asking myself what is to be learned from this crazy experience, besides the obvious of DRINK A LOT OF FLUIDS when you're running in the scorching heat. But the real lesson is that I need to pace myself, not just in running, but in all parts of my life. What's the point of a great start when you have nothing to give when it really matters? Too often in my life, I find myself pushing myself to my limits and then crashing, trying to fit way too much into each day or week. It seems pretty obvious that I cannot be everything and do everything I want to today, but bit by bit I can hopefully build a life I can be proud of. I also need to take better advantage of the aid stations (family, friends, and especially God), not just when I realize I am struggling, but throughout this race of life. Years ago, my high school seminary teacher directed me to a scripture that had a profound effect upon me, and I think it definitely applies: "...Let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith..." (Hebrews 12:1-2).

I have also thought a lot about death. It has never been something real to me until this race. I'm not sure how serious my condition really was, but I know that without the good care I received, I would have been in serious trouble. How terribly fragile our bodies are! A measly 13-mile run in the heat and I totally lost myself physically and mentally. That's pretty frightening. I feel like I have been given the opportunity to see my life with new eyes. I see my family, especially my husband and my kids, with much better clarity. Am I living every day I have with them to its fullest? Do those closest to me know how much I love them? I'd like to think that this experience has been somewhat of a gift. Although I am not at all looking forward to my outrageous medical bills, I figure it is a small price to pay if I actually learn something meaningful and live a little better as a result.

For the unabridged (even longer) and slightly more personal version of this story, click here.

Back to School

My dear little Adelyn started kindergarten on September 1st. She was very excited! I thought she would have no problem at all, but as I dropped her off the first day she was squeezing my hand really hard and I asked her how she was and she said, "I am REALLY nervous Mom." I helped her introduce herself to a few girls which helped a little.

Here she is in front of the big tree outside the kindergarten entrance.

She's ready to join the line of kindergartners and march into school. I drove away and was just sick the whole time she was gone. I was so relieved when she came skipping out to meet me at the end of the day. I knew we were both going to be alright.

Adelyn also learned how to ride her bike without training wheels this past month. She is absolutely lovin' it and finds every excuse to ride her bike. We biked to her school one day during the first week of school and she was able to show Preston her playground. She thought that was just about the best family activity ever.

Preston also started Joy School this last week. He and four other neighbor boys (along with one girl) have a blast learning about different things. The moms take turns hosting all the kids and teaching them about the Joys of life. The first unit is on the Joy of the Body. Yesterday he learned all about his five senses and got to taste, touch, smell, listen, and see many new things. It has been really fun for him and he is very proud that he is big enough to go to "school."

For Just Two Dollars...

...We get to have a blast every Tuesday in August at Thanksgiving Point. Admittedly, I am quite a cheap person overall and hate paying full price for ANYTHING. So this Two-Dollar Tuesday thing is a very joyous experience for me. We rarely visit Thanksgiving Point any other time of year, but totally get our fill in August.

We went to the Children's Garden the first time with my mom and two sisters (Camille and Rebekah). Adelyn's best friend in the whole world is her cousin Eliza, who she doesn't get to see very often now because she lives in Washington. But they had a blast at the garden together. The above pic is Addie sharing her towel with Eliza at the splash area.

The next time we went to the Children's Garden, we brought our neighbors from across the street, William and Leah. Incidentally, Leah is one of the only other girls on our street (there are about 20 boys!) so Adelyn and Leah have become very good friends lately.

Annalise LOVED playing in the sand. She got it everywhere, but it was definitely worth it to see her this happy.

The whole crew at the garden's caterpillar.

The kids went to the Dinosaur Museum twice as well, once with Ryan while I was at work and once with me while he was at work. They always have a great time, although Annalise was stuck in the stroller most of the time.

A cute dinosaur picture of Addie and Preston.

We also love Farm Country. Adelyn takes advantage of any opportunity to ride a pony and seems to get more confident every time.

Preston, however, prefers wagon riding to pony riding. He also just adores seeing all of the animals. He still talks about Farm Country often and wants to go back everyday.

Annalise had her share of fun too. Here she is with Ryan looking at the rabbits.

A darling picture of Addie with a peacock feather. I heart Thanksgiving Point! Thank you for making my August Tuesdays memorable.

Annalise's Portraits

My little baby girl is one. She is such a joy to have in our family. She is pretty mild-tempered, although she does not like being thwarted in anything. She has no interest in learning to walk yet, but she can get anywhere she wants to using her amazing speed-crawling and climbing skills. She eats like a horse, but no one believes it because she is still so little. She prefers to drink from a cup, even though she spills it all over her. She already refuses to wear a bib. She loves people and animals, singing and laughing. She still lets me cuddle and sing her to sleep in my arms, for which I am very grateful.

An eye-lash shot.

This is an expression I see a lot from her.

Oh, those eyes...

A more serious close-up.

Seeing her with these flowers reminded me of another one of her talents--getting into things and making big messes. Adelyn and I have nicknamed her "Baby Bulldozer!" She is very curious and determined. She is so fun to watch.

Annalise is such a precious little girl. We love her so much.

Preston's 3-Year Portraits

So I go to get Preston's 3-year portraits done, and although I had done my best to get him excited about the event (I even had a few bribes on the table: candy, stickers...), he still was not about to be cooperative. I looked at the photographer in desperation and she said, "Yeah, kids ages 1-5 are the very hardest." I laughed and said, "That's the only kids I have!"

I was just about to give up when we discovered this train. It was a life-saver! It was actually in every picture, but the photographer zoomed in on him on most of them. He would play with it for awhile, then we'd tell him to park it at the train station and smile. He was surprisingly cooperative if we let him play with it in between each picture. Now, when we go to Target, he wants to go back and play with his train. :)

This is how Preston shows off his muscles. You can't see it, but Preston was flexing so hard he was shaking in this picture.

Our cute little Preston guy.

Preston's Favorites at Three (based on a recent interview of the subject):

Favorite foods: hot dogs, pizza
Favorite drinks: water, milk, orange juice
Favorite colors: blue and green
Favorite TV show: Bob the Builder
Favorite movie: Toy Story
Favorite places to go: McDonalds, Thanksgiving Point
Best friends: Tayson, Kade
Favorite candy: "A lot of candy!!"
Favorite snack: carrots
Favorite vacations: Disneyland, Sea World
Favorite book: The Little Mouse, Danny and the Dinosaur, Monsters ABCs
Favorite song: Sunbeams; I am a Child of God; any song I make up for him (the sillier the better)
What he likes to do: play cars, go to Grandmas, eat food, color
What he wants to be when he grows up: airplane pilot, race-car driver

We love you, Preston! We cannot believe you are already three. You are growing up WAY too fast.

Celebrating Eight Years

We really wanted our anniversary (August 17) to be really special this year so we dropped our kids off at my mom's house (thank you Mom and Camille!) and spent nearly 24-hours all by ourselves in Park City. We went out to dinner at Redrock, which was my first time. Then we pampered ourselves and got massages. We went back to our hotel and went swimming and then watched a movie. The following morning, we went on bike riding and running before indulging in the hotel's hot breakfast buffet.

Then we went to the Utah Olympic Park and had a blast...

Doing the Alpine Slide. This was my first time ever. Unfortunately, we got stuck behind a young kid and we had to slow down several times. But fortunately, Ryan told the attendant guy and he let us go AGAIN for free! (It was much better the second time.)

Then we did the Xtreme Zipline, which is apparently the longest zipline in the world! Amazingly enough, Ryan was able to snap a picture of me when I got in front of him.

We went to the Tanger Outlets and browsed, then walked around the shops on Main Street and ate sandwiches and frozen yogurt on the little patio at the Main Street Deli.

We had such a great time! With three kids, we have found that it is really hard to get adequate togetherness time with each other. But it was so nice to have a day to celebrate the beginning of "us" and sort of be kids again ourselves. I love you, Ryan. Here's to many more happy years to come!

Mary's Wedding

My sister Mary got married this past weekend to Timothy Jensen in the Salt Lake Temple. We spent the whole day celebrating with them--what an amazing experience.

I LOVE this temple!

The happy couple.

Mary with my sweet dad. She was his last child to get married.

She is so beautiful and she was just glowing the entire day.

I loved her cake! Isn't it amazing! (It was yummy too.)

They look so sweet in this picture. They will be very good to each other.

Adelyn is so darling to pose for Ryan's photo-shoot.

Preston showing off his little personality.

Our princess Annalise was a trooper; it was a long day for her.

Sweet Annalise is One!

For Annalise's birthday, we gave Timpanogos Cave another try. This time we got tickets in advance. The hike was much easier than Stewart Falls and Preston was able to do more walking by himself. Annalise, however, still got to ride in the Bjorn.

This little birthday girl is already good at sharing. We gave her snacks to eat on the way up the trail and she worked out a little system: she would eat a bite and then feed me a bite. She is so cute and generous. :)

We made it up the trail without too much trouble. Everyone loved the cave except Annalise who apparently got bored and fell asleep.

We came home and had a little family party for her. She was surprisingly proficient at present-opening, especially for a one-year old.

Annalise's personalize pink cake.

Her first bite...

"This is quite delicious indeed."

" Um, I think I've had quite enough, thanks."

Park with Daddy

Ryan captured some really nice pictures of the kids when they went to the park together. So of course I thought I'd share them.

Happy Preston.

Annalise, the climber.

Sweetheart Addie.